Whatever Works for Your Family has to Work

When I started my private practice I wanted to be a safe haven for parents- I wasn’t going to push them to wean or get a babysitter or kick their kids out their bed. I believe in “whatever works for your family” and defend however you choose to feed or care for your baby and […]

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Feelings, Shmeelings, What’s so Great about Feelings?

I have spent my whole life working on being great with feelings- oh, I mean other people’s feelings. My feelings… yeah… maybe that’s a second half of life project. When I was a much younger woman, a guy I was dating argued that the problem was that I whispered my feelings. How was he supposed […]

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Gourmet, all organic, locally sourced sleep

I have sleep on the brain. I have been working on a new sleep workshop  with Leann Latus from Tender Transitions.  (Still room in Sleep-It Does the Family Good, please come.) We are not a culture that values sleep. We act like it is a treat or a sign of weakness or maybe a privilege. For […]

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A Day Without a Woman… or at least this one

The International Women’s Strike on March 8th, 2017 is an international day of action, planned and organized by women in more than 30 different countries.   In the spirit of solidarity and internationalism, in the United States March 8th will be a day of action organized by and for women who have been marginalized and […]

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You Know You Can Tell Me Anything, Right?

“Communication”- when couples come to me for the first time they often report that they have communication issues. “Communication issues” confuses even me. Of course they mostly speak the same language. Mostly they do talk to to each other- they can deal with the kids, the mortgage, the schedule but they can’t seem to have […]

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Fighting for Connection- Minnesota Style

Minnesota nice is the stereotypical behavior of people born and raised in Minnesota to be courteous, reserved, and mild-mannered. I love Minnesota- born and raised here and this week I can’t even hate the weather. I not only specialize in relationship counseling, but after 15 years I now specialize in Minnesotan relationship counseling. If a […]

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Postpartum Depression in Men- Filling those Huge Dad Shoes

Today is only February 9h- I can’t do Valentine’s Day yet. Here are some reruns.  The one about Loving Up Husbands for Valentines Day and the one about Loving Up Wives for Valentine’s Day. For the past 15 years, since my second was born,  I have been fascinated with the process of becoming a parent. Ok, in […]

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When is it Time to Go?

Rumor has it that divorce is too easy. Rumor has it that people don’t try hard enough. Rumor has it that people treat marriage like it is disposable. I know some silly celebrities (and politicians) have a string of exes but I don’t know real people who do that. Ok Huff Post does have a […]

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Into the Marriage Votex

I love doing marriage work. It is deeply rewarding to be trusted with a couple’s most valuable resource at a time of fear and hurt. For 15 years I have studied the patterns, the stages relationships go through. I see how they get built, how they break down and how they heal. I ask people […]

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A Meditation on Times of Uncertainty

In November 1980 I was 17- the last year I didn’t vote. Ronald Reagan was elected and I was devastated. The end was near. This warmonger was going to have his finger on the button. When I look back, it is easy to dismiss those fears…well because they didn’t happen. The past is nothing if […]

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