Why Kids Can’t Come with an Instruction Manual

Of course kids can’t come with instructions. When you go to Ikea and buy a bookcase, you take home a box that looks absolutely nothing like a bookcase but it has all the required pieces, a list of needed tools and one insane sheet of “instructions”.  It might take many frustrating hours but you aren’t […]

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My Baby is Graduating from Grade School…and so am I

I made it through! Tomorrow is my last day as the mother of a grade schooler.  Ok, that might not sound like a lot but remember I became a grade school mom in 1989- before some of you were born, in a totally different century. I can’t keep saying I have one grown child and […]

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Everyone Else Seems to Have Their Shit Together

Everyone on Facebook seems so happy. They don’t fight with their kids or get frustrated with their partners. Their mothers don’t make them crazy and they still fit in their jeans. The people on Facebook pay their bills on time and eat home cooked, nutritious gourmet meals every day. And they have clean bathrooms… ok, […]

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Love versus Safety

Love versus safety-This is the dilemma that is marriage.  We want to be loved and connected and appreciated and lusted after and cared for but we also want to be safe.  We don’t want to get our feelings hurt, don’t want to be ignored, neglected, scolded, criticised, misunderstood or rejected. But you can’t have both. […]

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More Stuff I Wish Men Knew…about Themselves

Brene Brown said- “Shame corrodes the very part of us that believes we are capable of change.” This got me thinking about my favorite topic- how to be more helpful to men, who don’t like therapy, who don’t like self help or parenting books, who don’t share their struggles easily and who are the ones […]

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Emergency Husband Alert Network

Please share. As 96% of my readers are female it is going to take some effort to reach the super secret husband network. If your children are old enough to have jobs and cars- ignore this warning. Those kids are on their own. If your children are not old enough to drive to Target-please pay […]

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Hard Lessons and Learning to Apologize

This week I learned a hard lesson.  After what felt like a great Parenting Genius Bar, I was forwarded a FB post by one of the participants about me, not naming me…and so hurt. I feel like I have been walking around using the N word or something and someone called me out. This mother […]

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How Do You Think People End Up Divorced?

I have been working with a client who is increasingly disappointed in her husband’s behavior- which at times feels emotionally abusive or sabotaging. The other day she had one of those wonderful “aha” moments- “I used to think that people got divorced because they wanted to get divorced. I am going to end up divorced […]

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Building a Strong Home Base…because the people you love make you crazy

Joey and I had a rough morning. He missed the bus because he was bugging his brother and his new amazing Nike socks actually take time to get on and his glasses weren’t where he left them. He was screwing around and teasing me. He was being 13. I as trying to get both boys […]

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What is it exactly that I “do”?

Full disclosure- I am double dipping. This is my homework. My assignment-  “A Final Narrative Personal/Professional Identity Paper summarizing how the (Kenwood Narrative Therapy) Certificate Program may have helped you re-author your personal/professional identity.” 6 months ago I signed up for this course because I was bored, fussy, stuck.  I was mostly trying to figure […]

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