Emergency Husband Alert Network
Please share. As 96% of my readers are female it is going to take some effort to reach the super secret husband network. If your children are old enough to have jobs and cars- ignore this warning. Those kids are on their own.
If your children are not old enough to drive to Target-please pay attention.
Next Sunday is Mother’s Day. I know- it is a Hallmark Holiday. We can and should honor the people we love each and every day…blah, blah, blah…
Mother’s Day is very complicated because at least in our community- Mothering is very complicated.
Mother’s Day is as important to your marriage as Valentine’s Day and your anniversary. I speak now as your Marriage Geek. This is very important. Mother’s Day is your chance to show your wife just how much you see what she does, appreciate her efforts and love how she loves your kids.
As a father one of the strongest influences you have with your kids is to teach them how to love and honor someone. We show kids both how to love and what to expect from being loved. Big stuff.
Mother’s Day is important because mothers are tired. So very to the bone tired. They are doing too much and not taking very good care of themselves. They are the emotional core of your home. Ignore the emotional core of your home at great peril.
First, do what your kids need you to do. Take them to Target to buy a card or go buy flowers or get the art supplies out and help them make something. Show them what it looks like to honor someone you love.
Then do something to show her that love. I have never heard a woman complain that her partner over did it…and believe me I hear about the ones who miss the mark. Do something special.
Here is what mom wants-
- If she isn’t getting enough sleep, she needs sleep. No one can be amazing every day without enough sleep. And she can’t even think about wanting anything until she is rested.
- If she is home all the time with the kids, she needs time alone. This means take the kids anywhere and stay there as long as you can. Bring them home happy, fed and tired.
- If she puts everyone first, she needs you to put her first. Do the thing she would never do for herself. Think massages, manicures, spa days.
- If she has been telling you what she needs and you don’t believe her…believe her. She wants what she says she wants. Do the dishes. Take her to church. Watch a chick flick with her. Just hear her.
- If you are not sure what she wants- Ask. Tell her how much she matters and how much it matters and get her to admit that she needs something special.
Good luck. And husbands, forgive me if I don’t make a big deal about Father’s Day. You matter. It just isn’t quite as complicated. It isn’t that I don’t care, I just don’t worry about your marriage on Father’s Day. Remember- I am fighting for you and your family. The most recent research says that over two thirds of divorces are filed by wives, angry, tired, dissatisfied wives. Wives whose husbands often just didn’t get how complicated this whole thing is.
Hope you have a lovely day. I will be honored by my wonderful husband and three boys at our non-traditional tradition- Laser tag marathon!