One turkey done, another set to go into the oven… part of my Thanksgiving tradition is to write my blog post before anyone gets up in the morning- thinking of the day ahead. The meal is predictable, the family keeps changing. We currently have no babies in our family- the youngest is my 13 year old but my niece is bringing her new puppy… the ones who were the kids are becoming the adults. (Although you don’t get to be counted as an adult until you bring FOOD to the holiday not just another mouth.)
The day ahead is tons of potatoes to peel, all the dishes will get dirty and then washed. (Oh did I mention my dishwasher broke this week?! Classic.) I am committed to asking for lots of help and sitting down more than I did last year. So I rehash my yearly Thanksgiving message to all of you.
Take a minute and reflect.
You are extraordinarily blessed if you spent the day with people who pissed you off and hurt your feelings. Remember that. Those opinionated, loud mouthed, obnoxious people are your family by birth or marriage or by choice. You will either have to face the enormous pain of their passing or they will be the ones left when you go. This is good. It is the whole point of life- to surround ourselves with people that matter, people that we love and keep working on and struggle with. Do they see things differently than you do? Is their experience something you can learn from, be open to? That is their gift in your life.
Remember, you are someone’s obnoxious, loud-mouthed pain in the butt relative. Someone’s therapist has heard a lot about you!
For people who have suffered a loss or are going through a divorce this holiday, I promise it gets better. There are things that time heals. Make plans for how much more you will be able to enjoy next year’s holiday. It’s ok to not love this time of year.
Have you had a rough year? Are you struggling? May your problems be worthy of your attention. You will die with dirty laundry and a to do list… just make sure the to do list is inspiring.
Right now while it is all still fresh in your mind- how did it go? What do you wish you had done differently? What about the day was most important, what made the day special?
Business strategy offers us the idea of continuous improvement. This means looking back and deciding what worked, and what didn’t work and making plans to adjust. The opposite is the definition of insanity- doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.
Doing a little post game analysis makes a huge difference because we forget. We do what we do unless we make a commitment to do differently.
Every year I put a note on December 1st of my Google Calendar- Start Christmas preparations early. I love the season, love making gifts and special food for people but I somehow forget to make it a priority until days before Christmas and then wish I had more time… every year, same thing.
Do you really need to do all you did? Was it worth it? Do you keep hoping it will be different next year? Was it as hard as you thought it would be? Make a note to yourself. Somewhere you will see it in early November. And while you’re at it… what about Christmas? Be intentional. How do you want it to be? Remember that you are establishing traditions and memories for your children. This is how they will remember the holidays and the expectations that they will carry forward to their families. Create a holiday that reflects your values, your needs. Let go of worn out traditions or things you feel you have to do.
Celebrate. Enjoy. Create some lovely, low stress memories.
(I am struggling some to get my winter schedule up… soon. )