Archive | conflict RSS feed for this section

Marriage Geek’s Serenity Meditation

Grant me the serenity to accept the truth about the people I love, the courage to ask for better behavior from them, and the wisdom to know where to put the bar. Marriage is tough because each of us, deep at our core, want to feel unconditionally loved and accepted. Criticism feels like betrayal or […]

Read full story Comments { 0 }

Resist the Urge- the guide to less freaking out

I was asked to offer Stop Yelling for a company training.  Not all their staff are parents so we wanted to make it more general than parenting. As I was teaching it last night I realized how parenting without losing our shit is the same as having a tough conversation with our partner without freaking […]

Read full story Comments { 0 }

I want my kids to feel lousy… well… kind of

Try this- read this to yourself (or out loud…interesting at work) I want my kids to feel (insert feeling)   mad- sad- worried- abandoned- frightened- bored- embarrassed disappointed- insecure- foolish- guilty- lonely- ashamed- rejected- tense You ok with that? These are the feelings that we have decided are “negative” feelings… obviously these are the uncomfortable ones. […]

Read full story Comments { 0 }

2016 Post Thanksgiving Commentary

Each year I sit down to write my newsletter on Thanksgiving morning before the festivities begin and set it to go out in the evening when the party’s over. Mostly I steal stuff from last years post and tweek it a bit. The best thing about holiday traditions is just how predictable they can be. […]

Read full story Comments { 0 }

Wiping my tears- Time for Service and Resistance

Wednesday was awful and I feared I couldn’t write, couldn’t see clients. Everyone I voted for lost. Today I woke up ready to fight. My progressive politics are an integral part of my Marriage Geek message- you are not required to read any further. I get it that lots of people don’t agree with me […]

Read full story Comments { 0 }

You Might Not be Fighting Enough

When a new couple comes into my office one of my first questions is “Are you fighting too much or too little?” By the time couples get to my office, the answer is usually they aren’t fighting enough. I have to say that if my practice was in some less Nordic state, I might get […]

Read full story Comments { 0 }