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Is Charity the Spirit of the Season?

When I was a moody preteen, I remember my mother stopped to help an elderly couple who seemed to be struggling on an icy Minnesota December day. At the time I was mortified that my meddlesome mother was butting into these strangers’ lives. Turned out they weren’t simply struggling with the ice. We got them […]

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Assertive Bill of Rights for the Holiday Season You Choose

I share some version of this every holiday season- for some reason holiday stress seems to be showing up early this year. Healthy attachment is at the core of my work. Attachment is how we want to raise our kids and how we want to be partnered and attachment is why the people we love […]

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Why I Hate November Rerun

This was my personal FB post this morning- “Evidence that I should not be in charge of my own schedule… today I have 7 clients scheduled, Zach’s conferences scheduled over my lunch hour, I am on call for the Helpline…which has been hopping all week, I am committed to posting a blog post before bed […]

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Being 3 is Hard…and Everyone I Know is Still Kind of 3

Being three is a year of big feelings. I wonder what it must feel like to spend  years learning to communicate, only to find that people just don’t do what you tell them to do. It must be endlessly frustrating that we don’t cut their toast right, can’t repair their broken bananas, make them wear […]

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A World at Half Staff

How are we supposed to feel? Each day, on my drive to work I watch the seasons change in the colors of the trees. I see the beauty of letting go, of summer losing out to fall and know what comes next. Because I get to cross the river on Cedar most days, it is […]

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Wonder and Delight- inoculate against stress

Anxiety is on my mind this week. Professionally I consider it the common cold of mental health- shows up a lot and responds well to treatment. Lately I have been considering the bigger picture of the huge increase in anxiety we are seeing in both parents and in our kids. Some facts- research shows as […]

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Resist the Urge- the guide to less freaking out

I was asked to offer Stop Yelling for a company training.  Not all their staff are parents so we wanted to make it more general than parenting. As I was teaching it last night I realized how parenting without losing our shit is the same as having a tough conversation with our partner without freaking […]

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Please Stop Reading Books

Don’t get me wrong- I love reading. If you are on Good Reads (FB for books) you may have set a New Year’s goal. I committed to 30 books this year. I am always reading 2 on my Kindle- one fiction and one professional and listening to one in my car. Now that my kids […]

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Big Feelings and The Worst Thing Ever

The other night, my 13 year old was reminding me that he was still protesting our families decision to have his brother move into the extra bedroom. (I recall coming to a consensus but we’ll agree to disagree.) I was in a crappy mood, trying to be done parenting for the night and he clearly […]

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Feelings, Shmeelings, What’s so Great about Feelings?

I have spent my whole life working on being great with feelings- oh, I mean other people’s feelings. My feelings… yeah… maybe that’s a second half of life project. When I was a much younger woman, a guy I was dating argued that the problem was that I whispered my feelings. How was he supposed […]

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